Passenger? or Pilot? Nobody ever wants to be a passenger in life but sometimes it happens and when it does it can be difficult to get out of it. You begin to adapt to the passenger lifestyle by just floating through life but not actually living it. So how do you get out of that and become the pilot of your own life? - by no means am I an expert in any area of life but then again, who is? - so brew yourself a hot one and lets go!
1. Do not compete with anyone else but yourself
Now this ain't easy. In fact I found it to be quiet difficult and its not something you can just master over night. It's not just an idea but a lifestyle change. Throughout the day you find yourself comparing this that and the other and you don't even realize it. I would see friends get these amazing graduate jobs or achieve high grades in every exam and don't get me wrong HELL YES TO THOSE PEOPLE but I couldn't understand as to why I couldn't do the same. This was a daily struggle for me until I learned that sometimes you need to ignore what everyone else is doing/achieving and start focusing on what you're doing. If you consistently continue to compare your achievements to other peoples achievements they become less valuable and less meaningful to you.
If this is something you find yourself doing one of the best things you can do to stop it is to just become aware. Become aware that your brain is wandering off to the "what if I was better" or "why couldn't I be that good" and start focusing on your strengths. Because I can guarantee that there is something that you can do that makes you unbelievably different from what you think you compete against. Celebrate friends achievement but don't forget to refocus on your own strengths and do not fear them. Your life is about breaking your own limits and outgrowing yourself to live YOUR life. You are not in competition with anyone else but you. Plan to outdo your past and not other people.
2. Use your life as a blank canvas
I like to think that life is a form of art, a canvas. Since the day you were born to this very second your canvas fills with new colours and textures with every single thing you do. Every 7am alarm, every flick of a page, every sip of hot coffee, every clouded judgement, every dream that has imprinted into your brain adds something to your canvas called life. Yes, your canvas can get a little scratched or splattered with a colour that might be a little too dark for your liking but its up to you to become the skillful painter that you need to strive for the perfect piece and to make sure your painting ends up right beside good aul Mona Lisa. If you've done something you don't like, paint over it and start again. That's when you become the pilot.
3. Form a synergy with the past, present and future
Allow your past, present and future to co-operate with each other. They all intertwine together and living life as a passenger means you allow the past to control your future. That's not what you want to allow happen. You cannot allow the memories of your past to limit the potential of your future. The only thing that can limit your future is your own mind. I read something recently and it made sense instantly. "Allowing your past to determine on whether you improve your life is like saying you don't have time to stop for gas because you are too busy driving" Eventually it will catch up on you and you're going to have to stop. Gain peace with your past and become excited for your future. That is when you will really take off.
4. Carefully decide who and whats important in YOUR life
The older you get the less you care about how many friends you have and you begin to appreciate how amazing the friends you currently have are. Everyone that steps into your life is either a lesson or a blessing, yet again adding to your canvas. It can be difficult to distinguish from both because a lot of the time you hope and wish that this specific person is a blessing. Before you know it you've both moved on and you have learned from it. That person was therefore a lesson. Or you can see it as a temporary blessing. If you find yourself constantly stuck between 'not being able to tell' and 'not wanting to admit' that this person may or may not be a lesson then move on. Life is too short to spend your time worrying about friends who aren't in it for the long run. Usually when I find myself in a situation were I find myself worrying and continuously unsure of a person or problem I literally stop. I stop walking, talking, writing and think ' Is this problem/person going to affect my life in 10 years?' If the answer is no then just let it go. If you answered yes then it's time to do something about it. I call it the 10 x 10 rule. If its not going to matter in 10 years then you should not let it matter to you for another 10 minutes. When it comes to friendships maybe its not always about trying to fix something that's broken but rather starting over and creating something better. When you accomplish that you have mastered the idea of taking control and becoming the pilot of your own life.
5. Believe in the Law of Attraction
Okay, so if you know me you have probably heard me speak and rave about the law of attraction. I plan to write a whole blog post on this but as of now lets keep it short and sweet. The law of attraction is a powerful thing. Its the idea of what you manifest will come true. Whatever you read about, speak about, talk about, believe in will come true. It might not currently feel like its happening but believe me it is. You just don't realize it at the time. Believe in it so much that it has no other choice than to become a reality. When it comes to believing in yourself its often said that we receive exactly what we expect to receive. So you right now should EXPECT A LOT. Because it's what you deserve and you should just let the magic happen.
So that is my five little tips on how you can start becoming the pilot of your own life. If you find yourself questioning on whether you are a passenger or pilot just sit and evaluate. Figure out what you can improve on and then start doing it. Start putting it into action. Doing that one little step can make the world of difference. I really hope you enjoyed our first little coffee chat. If you learned a little or just enjoyed it please let me know in the comments! It makes my day :) I also made a 'Be a Pilot' playlist on my spotify- the best songs to kick your life into first!!
Until next time.
Keep being you and let the magic happen.
Love R x